


Show Me What Loves All About

by Sweater_girl



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, M/M/M/M, Mentions of Rape, OT4, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-21
Updated: 2016-08-10
Packaged: 2018-02-14 04:41:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2178297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sweater_girl/pseuds/Sweater_girl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Luke is broken.<br/>The boys just want to fix him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I got the idea of this last night while rereading a Big Time Rush fanfic with a similar concept.  
> I was planning on this being a one shot but I decided against it.  
> I'm sorry it's so short.

Michaels eyes shifted through the darkness as he heard the front door open. It was half past 5am and he'd been up all night waiting for Luke to get back.

He was disappointed. Luke had promised that he'd stop. He'd stop going out when he thought the others were asleep and wouldn't return until early morning, trying to convince himself that the boys didn't know when he knew they did. He'd see their harsh stares when they were all eating breakfast, how they'd take in the circles under his eyes and the hickeys peaking out from under his shirt. It was quite obvious that they knew, it made Luke feel even guiltier. This had to be stopped. Michael knew. And if it wasn't, it would just get worse, and Michael couldn't stand to see Luke like that.

Michael listened carefully as Luke shuffled quietly down the hall, pushing the door to the room he shared with Ashton open, unbeknownst to him that Ashton wasn't in the room, that Michael was there instead, and Ashton and Calum were in the guest room waiting for the two. The blond turned to the door, gently guiding it closed as to not make any sound, and was still completely oblivious of Michael, until the door was closed and he turned around, only to come face to face with the older boy. Michael grabbed his arm, dragging him out of the room and towards the guest room, where he harshly pushed the boy in, and slammed the door behind him. The push would've made him fall, but Calum grabbed him by the shoulders before he could lose his balance and shoved him into the wall. Luke groaned and slid to the ground.

"Boys, calm down. We may be mad but there's no need to abuse him." Ashton told them from where he was sitting on the bed, before he stood and newly down in front of the youngest of the four. "Luke, you promised." His voice was soft and it made Luke feel like he was shrinking. He wanted the floor to just swallow him whole, take him out of his misery.

You see, Luke was raped by his father when he was 12. Left alone and broken until his eldest brother found him a few hours later. Luke didn't have to see his dad ever again, but the pain of being used was still there, permanently etched into his brain, the burning feeling never going away. He felt like he needed to be used. Like being used was the only way to forget about it. He was 13 and being used almost every night by different men. 5 years later and he didn't stop. He didn't know what love was. Didn't think it existed. Tears welled up in his eyes because he felt guilty. It always made him feel so goddamn guilty because his bandmates always said they loved him, but he just couldn't believe them, and while he was letting himself be used, they were hurting.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, quietly enough that the boys wouldn't have been able to hear him if they weren't paying such close attention to him.

"Your not fucking sorry if you keep doing it after you fucking _promised_." Michael growled at him. Ashton shot him a look before turning back to Luke.

"This isn't healthy Luke. You need something other than pain," but Luke shook his head.

"I can't. Pain and guilt is the only things I feel. I need to feel something and this is the only thing I can."

"But Luke, putting yourself through pain is hurting us too and you can't just-"

"But I have to!" Luke yelled. He was sobbing, tears spilling down his face. "I have to." He repeated, softer than before. He put his head in his hands.

He felt numb, and it was driving him crazy. He couldn't hear anything around him anymore. He could hear his heart beating rapidly and his heavy breathing but nothing else. He figured the boys were probably having a silent conversation through their eyes but he didn't want to look up. He didn't want to see the pain in their faces, he just wanted to disappear. He felt hands grabbing at him and all of a sudden he was being lifted from his spot against the wall and placed on the bed. Not even a second later and he was being cuddled into. His breakdown must've tired him out because he was asleep in minutes. Michael, Calum and Ashton were glad they had the next few days off, because Luke needed to be fixed, and maybe- just maybe- they could be the ones to fix him. God knows he needs it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise!
> 
> Im so fucking sorry. It's been two years since the first chapter was posted. A lot has happened since then and I always meant to update, but never got around to it 'til now. Fun story: I'm asexual! This story was meant to have smut in it, and I'm sure it still will, I'm just not sure how I'll manage to write it. But i promise it will happen!

Luke was curled up against the bathtub, the bathroom door locked and the light turned off. It was the morning after the incident. The guys were still sound asleep. He didnt know what to do. His skin itched to go back out into the cold cruelness of the world. To be used, to be abused.

But he couldn't.

He wouldn't.

He would.

The temptation of sex was just far too much for him to ignore. He promised the boys he wouldn't. He already broke that promise once, he didn't want to do it again.

But he had to.

How else was he supposed to feel like he was worth something? How else was he suposed to get his daily dose of artificial happiness? 

Happiness.

Was he happy? 

He wasn't.

How fucking dare they tell him what to do? Did they want him to lose his fucking mind? Meaningless sex was the onky thing that kept him alive since the day his fucktard if a father raped him. Six fucking years and all he got was three fucking people he called "friends" who didn't understand what the actual fuck he was going through-

Fuck.

He didn't mean it. He never means it. The guys meant well, but he couldn't fucking help it! His skin was on fire, his sad blue eyes burning with an aching desire, one that he was never meant to have in the first place. Tour was starting soon, and he wouldn't be able to make it out as often to numb himself once again. Fuck his promise. If he did it once he could do it again, right?

Right.

Erm- wrong.

He didn't want to do that to the boys- 

Did he?

No.

Yes!

They didn't actually care about him like they said they did, right?

Right!

They weren't the boss of him! He may be younger, but he was nineteen! He could make his own decisions! They didn't know what they were talking about, right?

Wrong.

Of course they knew what they were talking about. They wanted him to be normal. Nothing about what he did was normal. He wasn't normal.

Luke balled his fists into his hair, squeezing his eyes shut and pulling at it. The sunlight was starting to brighten up the bathroom and he knew that he wanted to get away before the boys woke up, he'd have to do it now.

But did he want to?

Yes.

No.

Yes.

No!

Yes!

Yes!

Frantic eyes opened, hands leaving his messy blond hair to push himself off the cold tile. Tiptoeing, as to not disturb the silence, Luke opened the door and warily peeked out into the abandoned hallway. 

The coast was clear.

Swinging the door open, he swiftly made his way to the front door. He had to make it out of there! 

"Hey!"

The noise startled him, Calum's voice cutting through the silence like a knife. Luke jumped in fear and went into a sprint. He desperately needed to get outside. He could hear Calum running after him, and neglected to shut the door behind him- not enough time.

Not enough time.

Not enough time.

Hurry hurry hurry-

He grunted as Calum's body collided with his own bringing both of them to the ground. He started to thrash around, onky noticing then that he had no shoes on. He could hear another pair of footsteps running towards them, undoubtedly Ashton as Michael would never be up at such an early time, and struggled harder to get away.

Gotta go gotta go gotta go.

Ashton yanked Luke up by the upper arm, Calum quickly jumping up to help the eldest drag him back inside,

Too late too late too late.

He couldn't get away. 

He didn't get away.

Why couldn't he get away?

Why did it hurt so much?


End file.
